The most elegant person I've ever known..

It was exactly a year ago roughly around this time of the night - 10 pm. He was on the ventilator : I peeped in past the open door of the ICU and saw him lying there with an oxygen mask on his face and both his arms tied down by wires that ran to the monitor above him. He turned towards the door and beckoned me with his eyes. I indicated that the security wouldn't let me in. He narrowed his eyebrows as if to say, "c'mon, take a chance..". I looked at the security and he said "Savere, Saat baje..". How I wish I hoodwinked the security that night...

I've missed Appa every moment of this last one year. Isn't that what everyone says, in similar terms when they lose someone near and dear? Well, I missed him more than anyone has ever missed anybody.

I miss his little grunt that escaped him around mealtime. I miss seeing him lying on his bed with one arm around the pillow and another one clutching a book - he would indicate that he wanted his legs massaged a bit. When we were young that was an invitation to simply lie there on his legs until he began snoring; as we grew taller, we would run our fingers up and down those legs a few times until he asked us to stop. I miss how he had his palms across his mouth as he watched cricket on TV - a passion we shared. 

I think about those joyous moments when the gramophone would belt out Sivaji Ganesan numbers and his lips would sync perfectly with every word of the lyrics. His hairstyle, his walking style,

his gait, everything about him would be so Sivajiesque. 

I've never met anyone who had as keen a sense of dressing as he had. Whether it was a suit for a wedding, a kurta-pyjama for a get-together, or even a casual T-shirt, trouser for a visit somewhere, he was always well-dressed. It took him a good 10 minutes to shave and he always took his time about it. Dev Anand was his role model and he did look like Dev Anand in some of the family albums.

What a complete all-round sportsman he was ! He played cricket, hockey,

Football, volleyball, table tennis, and athletics outdoors well into his forties. It was during an office sports event that he badly twisted his knee while pole-vaulting that put paid to active sports. Indoors, he could play billiards and was the family carroms champ. 

He had a talent for theatre: he had essayed varied roles for his company's Drama Clubs including one in the role of a female. He regularly won in their Fancy Dress Competition - I've seen him dressed in different occasions as a geisha girl, Arab, tribal, et al. He had some voice too and was the chief crowd puller at family weddings.

I think about those days when as a little boy I got a chance to sit on the petrol tank on his Rajdoot bike. I think about those days he would keep us on tenterhooks by reaching home barely in time to leave for the next Amitabh blockbuster. I recall how he would eat, with not a morsel of rice spilling over into his palms. Even now I can picture his right arm casually perched on the window of his Fiat Car as he held the steering wheel only with his left.

His handwriting is legendary in our family circles. He would spend a week every year between Christmas and New Year to send a Greeting Card to every colleague of his and every known family acquaintance - and he did this right up to the last year of his life. Even now, relatives mention that they miss his Greetings.

I miss how he always was a great host. He would always be the first to whip his wallet out and entertain, even after we had all began earning. He was so fiercely independent that he even paid for the hospital admission for what turned out to be his last one.

Memories are all we are left with but one thing is for sure, he left plenty of them.  He was, quite simply, the Most Elegant Man I've ever known. Miss You, Appa,..